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"Expecting life to always turn out the way you want is guaranteed to lead to disappointment because life will not always turn out the way you want it to. And when those unfulfilled expectations involve the failure of other people to behave the way you expect them to, the disappointment also involves resentment." - The Psychology of Expectations
If your EXPECTATIONS are too high, too wide, that this island will be another or better South Africa, or if you expect that this island is perfect... you WILL BE DISAPOINTED! Its a beautiful life if you let Ireland in.
Drop expectation at the airport when you leave SA... carry your family and your bags... and be OPEN to a new experience.
- Humans are humans. We are inherently good and bad! Dont expect Irish people to be the same or different to SA people. You will experience both. Ireland is also not just Irish people, you will encounter a LOT more cultures and people of different nationalities. Embrace that experience. Learn from the people you meet. Learn about yourself when you encounter people you don't like... what is the mirror, what am I learning about me when I see things I dont like. Leave any prejudice behind.
- Ireland is different to South Africa in all ways, and yet the same routine of life still exists. We wake, we eat, we go to school and work, we come home, we eat, we sleep. In there is also some boring times, some bills and some taxes and some life poop. Don't blame Ireland for the life poop. Its life poop. Making the choice to emigrate does not mean life poop stops. Be prepared for the life poop moments.
- Ireland is beautiful in her own magestic way. She is physically not the same as SA. The weather is different, the houses are different, the landscape is different, the roads are different... accept or adjust or you'll drive yourself nuts moaning about how its not Africa. Ps: its not a tropical climate.
- Teenagers will be teenagers and make all the wrong choices before they find the right one. People in your life will still pass away. Our parents will still die. People still get cancer. Children are born with disabilities. Marriages still fail. Whatever holds you when the pain hits, bring that with you... be that God, be that Faith, be that self-worth, be that Awareness, whatever that THING is that holds your beliefs... bring that! You will still need that to cope when the going gets tough. Your family IS far away when you emigrate. VERY. FAR. AWAY> Accept that as part of your choices
- Be clear on YOUR WHY. Why are you moving? YOUR WHY will hold you on the cold wet nights when you want to go back. And if you choose to got back, or choose not to come... thats ok! Its your life!
- You will have happy days.
- You will have sad days.
- Setting yourself up in Ireland is expensive. Have money. Be willing to spend it. Riches do not come easily anywhere on this planet. work hard, be careful where you spend and who you give money to, and be conscious that people will happily take your money.
- Things are NOT FAST in Ireland. Do not expect Ireland to be 1st world speed. Ireland beats her own drum. She will pace you. You can moan all you like. It is her beat. So, beat with Her or be out of step, your choice. You have no control of whats happening behind an office door, on the other side of an email or online form fill-in... You do however have control over your attitude towards whats happening. Chill or you'll make yourself ill.
- If you encounter NO- question why its a NO. If its something you have in your power to change, then change it. If its something you cannot change... go read the Serenity Prayer followed by the Desiderata. Stop, look, adjust and move with the No's.
- Ireland owes you nothing. Doesn't matter what passport you hold, why you are here, or how you came to be here. In South Africa you had to earn your stripes. Same here. Entitlement is a festering wound that will just leave your soul empty. Working and achieving something with your own hands and mind, leaves you full of experience and joy.
This could be your best life experience.
It could be your worst.
Its what you make of it that matters.
Read, read read read and write notes and read some more and be armed with knowledge!!!!
"Realize that the one thing you have absolute control over is your attitude." Time - performed by Sir Laurence Olivier
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